The Doctor Who Gives A F*ck Xmas Special

This month the podcast has the most Doctor Who content it’s had in a good long while as JB, Sean and Chris rank and review ALL 13 Doctor Who Christmas Specials from the modern era. They also speculate about what we’ll see in the upcoming New Years Day episode “Revolution of the Daleks”. Also, JB finally started watching “The Mandalorian” and Sean records his real-time reaction to the Dalek YouTube videos. WARNING: this episode contains callbacks to jokes that were edited out of the podcast. Happy holidays!

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See Your Doctor If Your Election Lasts More Than Four Days

Recorded during day four of the 2020 U.S. Presidential Election, three middle-aged American white males who did NOT vote for Trump attempt to review the Big Finish Audio “Time in Office”. CONTENTS INCLUDE: Chris is not a Cyberman, dissing and defending “Delta and the Bannermen”, classic companions showing up in movies, watching “Star Wars” for the first time, getting old sucks, JB’s ultimate locker room humiliation, explaining jock straps to Sean, nude swimming class, Sean tries to bluff his way through a Big Finish review, pulling a Dodo with Turlough, rehashing “The Face of Evil”, Janet Fielding is your favorite drunk aunt, bitching about the Peanuts specials moving to Apple TV, sneaking alcohol into movie theaters and airplanes, Tim the Time Lord and the Voltron TARDIS, “on Concord”, the age of consent in England, destroying “Talons” DVDs is now trending, a brief history of black characters in Classic Who, David Tennant almost played Hannibal Lecter, plaster casters, podcasters on Ambien, manatees are writing Big Finish Adventures, Chris breaks up and JB cracks up, closing in on 270, we completely missed the L.I.N.D.A. reference, David Tennant shilling products on his podcast, Doctor Who references on Saturday Night Live, watching SNL in the 80s and 90s, how the Trump-to-Biden transition will be like the Moffat-to-Chibnall transition, when will AOC be old enough to run for President?, an update on our download numbers, JB’s not-well-thought-out plan to bribe listeners for podcast reviews, why “The Muppet Movie” holds up and “The Muppet Show” doesn’t.

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Bigly Finish

Seven months into the pandemic, and maybe things are starting to look up? This month JB, Sean and Chris get political on all y’all while reviewing the Big Finish audio adventure “The Lovecraft Invasion” starring Colin Baker.

CONTENTS INCLUDE: Where we were when Trump got Covid-19, the train-wreck that was the Presidential Debate, Texas messes with early voting, Tom Baker is officially a fossil, an ode to Smokey Joe, the replacement rat on the Talons blu-ray, diversifying the background characters in the “Fury from the Deep” animation, getting Twitter love from Frazier Hines, Sophie Aldred and Juliet Landau, getting overwhelmed by Big Finish’s catalogue, another plug for the Big Finish app, who the fuck is Flip?, using personal pronouns and verb tenses when talking about time-traveling transgenders, death of the author, Colin Baker sounding much older, we talk about smoking for almost eight minutes, Big Finish taking the Chibnall approach in dealing with Lovecraft’s xenophobia, woeful American accents, cribbing from “Vincent and the Doctor”, the Doctor meeting Thomas Jefferson, “The Shakespeare Code” is now as problematic as “The Talons of Weng-Chiang”, did the 456 aliens inspire QAnon?, nine hours of Dalek dialogue, the most offensive cat name, dissecting the Radio Times Doctor Who poll, “NMD’s” and “JodieBots”, Republicans are morons, Christmas at Ground Zero.

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The Captain's Log

Six months into the pandemic, and we’re still at it.

CONTENTS INCLUDE: Sean obsessively purchases replacement DVDs, Time Flight over Hell Bent, we got over 3,000 downloads last month, the “silent majority”, we don’t do Instagram, reviewing the Tom Baker/David Tennant Big Finish story, Christopher Eccleston does Big Finish and why he really left the TV series, JB and Sean talk about “The Umbrella Academy”, paying to watch first-run movies on streaming, watching Classic Who in movie theaters, it’s Chris’ turn to present a game, that prattling DJ, Beat the Geeks, watching all the pretty goth girls dance, interrupted by gunshots, don’t fuck with the Jedi Master, “Don’t Stop Me Now”.

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Who Lost The Thread?

Five months into the pandemic, and we’re still podcasting while drinking cocktails. It’s the only way we know how to stay sane in this insane time.

CONTENTS INCLUDE: JB sounds like Ira Glass, The OOD Cast made too much work for themselves, we aren’t NPR, recording in different time zones, Steve Martin, “Everyone’s a Little Bit Racist”, “Pocahontas” and toxic boyfriends, Sean learns about the “MeToo” movement, Chris wants to go cold turkey on all the swearing, rate and review our fucking podcast, a question from Jeff Waddell, a shout-out to Caleb and “The Crow Hat” podcast, we now have a Twitter account, Victorian-era Clara should’ve been the companion, Tom Baker gets another new companion on Big Finish, decent villain roles for persons-of-color, we play a new game, Chicago TARDIS goes virtual for 2020, JB does not sound like Ira Glass, “Toxic Adventurer” by Dancing Rat.

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Trials and Triple Libations

JB, Chris & Sean take turns acting as prosecutor, defender and judge as they place a handful of Doctor Who stories on trial. This is probably the crudest episode we’re recorded thus far from beginning to end, so we apologize in advance.

TODAY’S (randomly picked) TRIAL DOCKET: “Listen”, “The Rescue”, “The Hungry Earth/Cold Blood”, and “The End of Time, Parts 1 & 2”.

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DWGAF Trailer 1 (uncensored)

The Chicken Soup of Doom

Hey, it’s JB. Chris, Sean and I went almost three hours recording this one. We were really inebriated and got into a very cathartic and politically charged discussion, most of which you’re NOT going to hear. I’m lucky I got an hour of usable material for this episode. Please forgive the audio levels. I promise to be the designated driver next time we record an episode, cause I get really fucking loud in this.

CONTENTS INCLUDE: A botched intro, listening to Yes and Queen, Chris gets tested for Covid-19, sponsorship, “professional” podcasts, problematic creative people and cancel culture, James Cordon’s Doctor Who Cosplay Challenge, bitching about aging (again), what’s a Cloister Wraith?, Moffat mansplaining the Bootstrap Paradox, Nicola Bryant offering personal hypnotherapy sessions, why do they defer to the First Doctor on multi-Doctor stories?, JB really needs to stop yelling into the mic, the “Lockdown Video” featuring Bill & Nardole, Doc liked “City of Death”, watching “The Sensorites” as punishment, “The Edge of Destruction” as a Pinter play, should the Police Box be abolished from the series?, filming new episodes on video and CSO, “Rosa” and confronting our white privilege, Sean praises “Vincent and the Doctor”, “Home”, everyone should watch Mr. Rogers, cocky leaky soup, “The Noodle Doodle Man” by Jon Pertwee.

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Show Us Your TARDIS

It’s your monthly dose of drunken Doctor Who podcasting for the end times.

CONTENTS INCLUDE: The Three Doctors on Zoom, dissing “Four to Doomsday”, Tegan’s PTSD, planting potatoes on Facebook Live, busted by the wife, attempting to use “City of Death” as an aphrodisiac, fucking Twitter, GATEKEEPING, Steven Schapansky - Social Justice Warrior, Demat-circuit or butt-plug?, The Wife in Space, cheating with the “Trust Your Doctor” podcast, Liz Myles, “Mel got a spaceship!”, fans shitting on Colin Baker’s era, Radio Free Skaro’s unbridled hatred of “The End of Time”, Moffat hater or Men’s Rights Activist?, Graeme Burk would hire Danny Pink as a schoolteacher, the infamous Jon Pertwee corporate video, law firm Christmas parties, we can’t watch “Mad Men”, shameless podcast plug #1, Colin Baker on Cameo, you see a penis and I see vagina, more dissing of “Four to Doomsday”, Tegan’s gay cousin, mourning for a broken “Battlestar Galatica” DVD, Pixar Butt, “Time Lord Victorious”, lame 70’s sit-com reference, no one’s buying 13th Doctor merchandise, Eric Roberts returns as the Master for Big Finish, Jenny #1 and Jenny #2, mixing the classic with the modern, Drax, Jago & Lightfoot, Glitz & Dibber, shameless podcast plug #2, how we would write out “the fam”, “Thazmine”, Grace is Ruth, Star Wars toys, He-Man and She-Ra action figures, Yaz is Martha, what are our backstories for being the new companion?, a Movellan as the new companion, “Leave the girl!”, eliminating sexual tension from the series, Handles is the perfect sex toy, “The Buxom Country Maid” by Jon Pertwee.

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The Rise of Stolen Fluid Links

More foul-mouthed, drug-induced Doctor Who discussion by the Three Who Drool. Please remember to drink responsibly even if you are stuck at home!

CONTENTS INCLUDE: Doctors thanking real doctors, new podcast theme, condolences to Georgia, babysitting the kids, JB’s unemployment saga, Chris returns to the Dirty WHOers, JB’s “Invisible Enemy” story, “Last Christmas”, Jenna Coleman welching on conventions, “Farewell, Sarah-Jane”, Sadie takes over for her mom on Big Finish, Luke is gay, Tegan is not gay, George Takei, “Lost Girl”, Sean didn’t get Eric Roberts’ autograph, creeping out Sarah Sutton, “podner”, Steve’s autographed cricket ball, Doctors on “The Big Night In” and the toxic fan backlash, WHO looked good?, Randomizer.net, “Enemy of the World” is now a historical, JB loves “The Chase”, Sean revisits the Target Novelizations, Terrence Dicks, Doctor Who death pool, “Susan’s War”, “which rapist should I vote for?”, the boys brushes with fame, Chris’ Bacon number, which Doctor do you want to save us from Covid-19?, Jiminy Glick impressions, trying to remember Series 12, watching “The Five-ish Doctors” with Peter Davison, Ace needs actual closure, fanboying over Eternals, why we didn’t do a commentary, is Bill the Dodo of the modern series?, Karen Gillan is still on the free list, what does the TARDIS smell like?, hair envy, Doctor Who tackling porn addiction, “The Stuff”, that Star Trek episode with Ashley Judd, keep Troughton and burn Hartnell, Chris loves “The Macra Terror” and the Chumblies, shout-out to Jeff Waddell, River closes the show, “Who’s Doctor Who” by Frasier Hines.

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DON'T PANIC!

The podcast officially regenerates for the new age of uncertainty and social distancing over Skype. JB, Chris & Sean cope with the new normal by playing “the Game of Rassilon” where Doctors and companions are randomly mixed and matched into stories which were also mixed and matched to other writers.

CONTENTS INCLUDE: Doctor Who DOES give a fuck, “that’s what she said!”, Graeme Burk writes a decent comedy sketch, Big Finish, Tom Baker’s voiceover outtakes, not buying the Blu-Rays, midwestern accents, 4x3 vs 16x9 aspect ratios, killing off Nardole, “it was Earth all along!”, fake plastic tree monsters, Neil Gaiman grudge match, a cameo from Reed, Amanda Fucking Palmer, ASMR in space, “Ben”, HIP mall, Project Runway rejects, non-recyclable Autons, gay spiders, killing off Lee from the TV movie, racist jokes from The Walking Dead, the dark side of Patrick Troughton, convention sex, virtual conventions, RIP MLB, enjoying social distancing, hoarding TP and eggs, political memes on Facebook, Dystopian or Star Trek future?, “It’s Gonna Get Better”.

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The End of the F*cking World

...in which you've got nothing else better to do while under self-imposed quarantine than to listen to three drunk middle-aged white guys talk about the later half of Series 12 of Doctor Who. JB, Sean & Chris didn't bother to remember any of the episode titles, but they have plenty of theories and opinions. As an added bonus, find out which two of our panelists have been incarcerated.

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New Podcast Episode - "Doctor Who Gives A F*ck"

... in which three ex-Doctor Who podcasters get the band back together. 

JB Anderton (WHO 37), Chris Buchanan (Dirty WHOers), and Sean Homrig (The TARDIS Tavern) have a virtual boys night out (w/alcohol and edibles) and discuss the first five stories of Series 12: "Spyfall" (Parts 1 & 2), "Orphan 55", "Nikola Tesla's Night of Terror", and "Fugitive of the Judoon".

Opening Theme: "Doctorin The Tardis" by The KLF
Closing Theme: "Bigger on the Inside" by Aurelio Voltaire

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